Welcome to our futuristic new world<p>
The date is March 24th and the year is 2024<p>
Today in the news<p>
Since the gun ban has been working so well...<p>
The law forbidding police to have sex with prisoners in intake has been repealed.<p>
In other news<p>  Drug rates are down 400% percent since 2018<p>
The program is interupted..<p>
Ever since coffee was found to be a gateway drug<p>
and coffee addicts have been sent to internment camps<p.
Ever since the Mormons have taken control of the government<p>
and America's population has dropped to 50,000,000<p>
This is the people's census...